I’ve been trying to think of how to announce this for a while, or even if I should, but what the hell? Now is the time of open-mindedness and whatever the heck else people want to shout about.
My name is now FractiousLemon. This can also be spelled Fractious Lemon. As of this point, I am a genderless fruit-headed being in a white suit.
I used to be a boring white male human named Matt Garner and I’d go back and retroactively correct my autograph on all of my art and everything to erase any evidence of my prior self, but… meh. That’s a lot of trouble to go to. I’ll just say I was exposed to gamma radiation or something and I mutated or discovered myself or evolved or whatever. I don’t care.
I’m Fractious Lemon now. Or FractiousLemon.
No. I’m not joking. I really want to be referred to as this from now on unless you know me personally. Call it my stage name or whatever. I still don’t care. Except I do. Misuse my name or the pronouns that I didn’t bother to mention and I’ll smite you with my laser eyeballs that I definitely have now. Peace out, ya’ll.